One Solid Week of Bullet Journaling

Hello readers we are officially one week into the new year. I've gone back to school and work and finding time for bulletjournaling has honestly been a struggle. However, I have learned a lot. 

For starters, listing what I'm good at. This page was mostly blank for the first five days. The term "good" felt very loose and the perfectionist within defined being good at something as mastering that skill. Lacking experience and being a student in some of those fields made it impossible to meet that standard. After a few days I forced myself to define "good" as "at least one step above amateur" Then I was easily able to really fill the page. 

I stepped back and thought about that experience for a while and realized how much of an influence my inner perfectionist was to my self-confidence. That is something I will have to work on this year. 

I've always known that my circadian rhythm was something to be desired. Seeing it visually mapped out on a chart filled me with a feeling of weirdness I didn't know how to put to words. At the same time there was something oddly satisfying about routinely coloring in charts. Can someone with a full understanding of human psychology explain this to me please?

Struggling with lowgrade depression was not a surprise. I was highly aware that I could go days feeling numb or overwhelmed with sadness and frustration that I couldn't find the root cause of. However, seeing the struggle mapped out in a colorful, creative, fashion also felt weird. I want the bright colors to outweigh the dark and I want to believe that I'm in an uplifting mood every day for the entirety of the day. That's not reality though. This week has been a struggle but the next one will be better. 

This page, like most of the journal is just oddly satisfying for me to look at minus the lack of actual bulleted paper. (When you're on a budget you've got to make do with what you have am I right?) 

There is something about the room for creativity in this hobby that sparks relaxation but also excitement. 

It brings about the joy I felt as a kid when coloring in coloring books but also inspires me to break into good habits like actually keeping track of my finances, being aware of my lack of self-confidence and mood swings, and tracking my workout routine. 

All in all I can rightfully say this has been one of the most zen hobbies I have ever gotten into. I'm eager to see how this next week goes. 10/10 would recommend. 

-JustJane

"Journal writing is a voyage to the interior."

-Christina Baldwin

So I Started Bullet Journaling

January is just around the corner. The "New Year New Me" meme is quickly approaching.  Time to convince myself I'll instantly change into the best version of myself and continue to grow and improve over the course of another 12 month. Real talk though, I stopped setting new years goals several years ago because I know each year entails a handful of heartbreaks, a major event, and at least six different hair colors. At least, that's how it's been for the past five years. Will this year be different? Will I actually post regularly and upload more than one youtube video every 6-8 months? I'm not going to lie and say yes. However, I will stubbornly hold on to the hope that this year will in fact be "my year". 

Anyway, to welcome the new year and the illusion of a better me I decided to branch out and try bullet journaling. I genuinely wish I had made this decision sooner. 

I don't know what it is but there is something oddly satisfying about filling a book with artsy pages like this. It fills me with a spark of accomplishment and fuels the illusion that I have this organized grasp on my life. At the same time the perfectionist in me is screaming and comparing my uneven lines to the picture-perfect bullet journal accounts on Pinterest and Instagram. How on earth does everyone make their handwriting look like legitimate font? Then again I'm using a blank sketchbook as opposed to graph paper. 

Anyway, I've added pages with charts to track my sleep and my mood throughout January in an attempt to combat lowgrade depression and insomnia. I made this conscious decision because near the end of the quarter and as of a few weeks ago I neglected my physical health and also allowed myself to become 200% emotionally drained. Hugh sat me down and explained that I'm the type of person who will give to others and feel worthless if I'm not able to do so. "You have to give to yourself." I proceeded to cry in response because that was absolutely true and someone had finally put it into words. 

From here on out self-care is a priority. For the entirety of last night I continued working on my bullet journal and turning to youtube and pinterest for ideas. I drew the line at using the journal for a planner as well because realistically I use planners for a few months, forget about them, and then use them when really important deadlines are about to pass. 

I'm excited to dive into this hobby and hopefully it will inspire me to establish a routine of good habits, a slightly healthier lifestyle, and continually de-stress. Shoutout to @thejournalwitch on Instagram. Your beautiful pages inspired me to get into bullet journaling. 

-JustJane

"Tomorrow, is the first blank page of a 365 page book. Write a good one."

-Brad Paisley